animal rescue
A mountain rescue team came to the aid of a hamster whose owners took him for a rocky walk. Frappuccino was with an 11-year-old daughter and her mother who got lost in the dark after walking in the Brecon Beacons. Central Beacons Mountain Rescue said the family, “including their little furry friend”, had been warmed up by rescuers.
Subway (Amanda Welles)
[See also: This England: Story of my life]
To take a walk
A rude ghost who swears at passing walkers is investigated by ghost hunters. A ‘woman in white’ has been seen at a beauty spot called Dead Woman’s Ditch in the otherwise idyllic hills of Quantock, Somerset, with reports claiming she told visitors to ‘f*** off’.
The profane poltergeist was first reported two years ago. Everything then calmed down, but now she has apparently returned with her anti-social outbursts. But not everyone in the region is convinced. Local resident Dean Morgan said: “It all seems a bit scooby-doo volume.”
Daily Mirror (Daragh Brady)
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[See also: This England: Attack of the clones]
All over the store
Victoria sponge instead of scouring pads, duck paste instead of duct tape and sausage rolls instead of toilet paper were among the oddest substitutions to show up in shoppers’ online grocery orders . Which? however, not all substitutions were bad, with one Asda buyer receiving three £60 bottles of whiskey to replace three £25 bottles that were out of stock.
Yorkshire Post
(Michael Meadowcroft)
[See also: This England: Once in a blue moon]
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This article originally appeared in the March 2, 2022, issue of The New Statesman, heroes of our time